Beer for money brings money for beer!!!

McCain�s Economic Plan For Nation: 'Everyone Marry A Beer Heiress'

McCain gets bitch slapped!

Obama Runs Constructive Criticism Ad Against McCain

4000 years ago...

According to Sarah Palin!

This election's a joke!

How anyone could believe the McCain/Palin ticket is a better choice is beyond me. During a HEATED political debate with myself, Nip, Nod and Brab I was advised by Brab that I would be going to Hell if I didn't vote for McCain. Brab says it's the right christian thing to do. Well what if you're not a christian? Brab says "You're stupid and going to Hell."

Well, the bad news is Hell is coming to us. The pentacostles (Sarah Palin's group of religous fanatics) sing of how their lives have no meaning here on earth and await armageddon so they can all be saved by the second coming of Jebus! Really? This is the progressive thinking you want to see in a leader of our government? And you wonder why the middle east is in such turmoil right now? The repulicans are trying to INDUCE armageddon!!!

And now for some fun...

Our newest pet...

'Nuff said!!!

The Black Widow...

Uncle D killed a Black Widow in our garage today. Does this make her mate a Black Widower?

Saying "_____ is for suckers."

Is so TOTALLY for suckers.

Thank you for sharing your whit and ultra motivated intelligent thoughts! Awesome!

Attn: All You Super Suckers!

Add this url to you podcasts in iTunes -

http://feeds.theonion.com/OnionNewsNetwork

Then maybe you wont suck so much!

Things I've Learned...

Flies go splat. Wasps crunch. Wasps are much harder to kill than flies when they are on a rug. Both are terribly annoying.

War Report (Thanks Doug!)

After establishing a treaty with the wasps i.e., I didn't use the back door where their nest was located and in return they would no longer invade my house, get in my clothes or get in my face while I slept.

Doug, acting on his own volition, went renegade with another all out assault on the nest. Thus breaking the treaty and sending the frenzied wasps back into my bedroom.

After explaining to Doug that his actions have caused great unrest and launched a second wave of angry hornets into my otherwise peaceful sleeping area he had this to say -

"Well, they need somewhere to go."

Thanks Doug!

This is what I get?

I post a clever acronym for abs. I write a war report with pictures. The only comment I get is "truthiness is for suckers"? Brilliant! Blogging is for suckers! My work is done here.

I'm not trying to be mean...

I'm just trying to keep a high level of truthiness and humor. Don't take it personally, I still love you all.

Let the bodies hit the floor...

War Report: 090208

After the first week of operation "Backyard Freedom" I have this to report from the war zone.

We began offensive strikes at 10pm MST last Thursday. The availability of natural weapons here in Pueblo were virtually non-existent, obviously too new age for this town. We were forced to resort to chemical poisons. The one I chose shot a stream up to 27 feet and claimed to kill the hornets for 4 days after spraying.

I went in with my poisons and shot them straight into their home in my home. Targeting every access point that the enemy was using. Ruthlessly spraying the toxins whilst the the enemy forces staggered from their nest and fell to their death.

I regret to report that the chemical warfare was not as successful as we had hoped. The morning after my initial attack the enemies had brought in reinforcements. Their numbers had almost tripled.

Our largest success has come from hand to hand combat. The enemy casualties have been averaging 20 a day. However this style of battle is much more dangerous and not very effective in the annihilation of an entire hive.

Yesterday we launched our second chemical warfare attack. Once again spraying deep into the enemies home sparing not one once of the poison. Again only to be met this morning with the enemy troops nearly doubled.

At this point, if I were George W. Bush, I would be addressing you with a goofy smile and a sign behind me that says "Mission Accomplished" claiming we have won the war.

Beer gives me ABS!

Abusive Bowel Syndrome.